Our IMPOSTOR EDITION 2: CASINO ROYALE (’67) would draw even fewer tweeters than NEVER SAY NEVER AGAIN. Inconceivable. But would this motley skeleton crew give good #Bond_age_? Or just wilt beneath the barrage of insanity? It’s hard work keeping up with #CR67… hard goddamn work. I’ll refrain from including explanations/interjections between tweets because, well, that would be antithetical to he spirit of the movie itself.
SAY HELLO TO MY LITTLE IMPOSTOR FRIEND! INITIATE MISSION! #CR67
— #Bond_age_ (@007hertzrumble) July 25, 2013
*dances to groovy theme song* #CR67
— kim (@kimmiechem2) July 25, 2013
@007hertzrumble Ursula Amdress Caroline Munro Bert Kuock …
— Eddie Love (@EddieLove44) July 25, 2013
Herb Alpert’s Chart-topping title theme, ladies and gentleman. #CR67
— #Bond_age_ (@007hertzrumble) July 25, 2013
@p2wy Well, I mean, you could, sure. #CR67
— #Bond_age_ (@007hertzrumble) July 25, 2013
Okay, with all these directors, did they forget how to frame this scene in the car? Why is the driver off frame? #CR67
— #Bond_age_ (@007hertzrumble) July 25, 2013
#CR was 1st Fleming novel, only one not sold to EON. CBS TV 1st adapted for an episode of CLIMAX! w/ Barry Nelson as Jimmy Bond in ’54 #CR67
— #Bond_age_ (@007hertzrumble) July 25, 2013
Niven’s chair is called a “chamber horse,” a home exercise fad from 18th century Britain. #CR67
— #Bond_age_ (@007hertzrumble) July 25, 2013
I rather fancy David Niven as a Bond emeritus. #CR67
— kim (@kimmiechem2) July 25, 2013
its a traaaaap #cr67
— Liam Fitzgerald (@LiamFitzgee) July 25, 2013
David Niven plays Bond as I would play Bond. #CR67 #posh
— Patrick Goff (@p2wy) July 25, 2013
But James Bond was an ornithologist not a botanist. #CR67
— #Bond_age_ (@007hertzrumble) July 25, 2013
@007hertzrumble This Bond is an even Classier Gentleman than the real 007. He’s up a tier with his fancy stuff. #CR67
— T. R. Wilcox (@TRWilcox) July 25, 2013
@007hertzrumble The real Bond can’t listen to Debussy without earmuffs. #CR67
— T. R. Wilcox (@TRWilcox) July 25, 2013
@007hertzrumble you mean someone had the stones to increase it? Like it made a huge difference
— Eric Jones (@deacon05oc) July 25, 2013
To put this in perspective, THUNDERBALL had a budget of $9-$11mil and YOLT was $9.5-$11.5. As a result, #CR67 was called “mini-Cleopatra.”
— #Bond_age_ (@007hertzrumble) July 25, 2013
@TRWilcox Instead of sharks we should take shots for every meta joke. #Toast #CR67
— #Bond_age_ (@007hertzrumble) July 25, 2013
More taxidermy than Colonel Blimp! #CR67
— Patrick Goff (@p2wy) July 25, 2013
A hair loom! Ah, the blessed pun! #CR67
— kim (@kimmiechem2) July 25, 2013
@007hertzrumble I think his performance is the closest to actual funny this movie gets. #CR67
— T. R. Wilcox (@TRWilcox) July 25, 2013
This is more like Castle Anthrax. #CR67
— #Bond_age_ (@007hertzrumble) July 25, 2013
Ok, this isn’t #CR67 related, but I can’t believe the silly girl picked Niven over Livesey in STAIRWAY TO HEAVEN.
— kim (@kimmiechem2) July 25, 2013
There is some actual spying in this, right? #CR67
— Patrick Goff (@p2wy) July 25, 2013
David Niven was actually Ian Fleming’s original choice to play Bond. #CR67
— #Bond_age_ (@007hertzrumble) July 25, 2013
I always forget Deborah Kerr is in this. It’s like I assume she’d be in a better movie. #CR67
— #Bond_age_ (@007hertzrumble) July 25, 2013
I think Deborah Kerr and her ridiculous accent are funny, too, but I’m a sucker for exaggerated accents. #CR67
— T. R. Wilcox (@TRWilcox) July 25, 2013
@p2wy Yeah, I don’t see there being much of a legitimate explanation for this movie. 5yo are far more reasonable than we are. #CR67
— #Bond_age_ (@007hertzrumble) July 25, 2013
Burt reminds me of Austin Powers @007hertzrumble
— Raider Origins (@raiderorigins) July 25, 2013
@p2wy Yeah, I don’t see there being much of a legitimate explanation for this movie. 5yo are far more reasonable than we are. #CR67
— #Bond_age_ (@007hertzrumble) July 25, 2013
@LiamFitzgee As I said earlier, it’s simultaneously worse and better than you remember. #CR67
— #Bond_age_ (@007hertzrumble) July 25, 2013
@007hertzrumble agreed, someone should really take the time to write out what she’s saying tho…i might have to turn subtitles on #cr67
— Liam Fitzgerald (@LiamFitzgee) July 25, 2013
@007hertzrumble yeah i guess, not sure what a garl garalll is…but i desperately want to be a part of it #cr67
— Liam Fitzgerald (@LiamFitzgee) July 25, 2013
OHNOES THE REAR PROJECTION IS CATCHING UP TO YOU, JAMES! #CR67
— #Bond_age_ (@007hertzrumble) July 25, 2013
@007hertzrumble They’ve upgraded to slot cars now! #CR67
— T. R. Wilcox (@TRWilcox) July 25, 2013
You know, most of this movie isn’t any more of a spoof than the last half of YOLT. #Trollin ##CR67
— #Bond_age_ (@007hertzrumble) July 25, 2013
Scenes w/ Woody Allen shot in London. Final shooting day was delayed so many times that he left, flew back to NYC w/o changing costume #CR67
— #Bond_age_ (@007hertzrumble) July 25, 2013
It’s really too bad that we never borrowed this Moneypenny for the real Bond. #CR67
— #Bond_age_ (@007hertzrumble) July 25, 2013
“your mom did some of her best work at night” serious laugh #cr67
— Liam Fitzgerald (@LiamFitzgee) July 25, 2013
Yeah, I really don’t know what the joke is here. #CR67
— #Bond_age_ (@007hertzrumble) July 25, 2013
Evelyn’s glasses. Want. #CR67
— kim (@kimmiechem2) July 25, 2013
@007hertzrumble you’re telling me the school children weren’t in the novel? Preposterous!
— Kyle Turner (@TyleKurner) July 25, 2013
“@007hertzrumble: Here’s our Oscar nominated Dusty Springfield track. #CR67” <– a worthy & wonderful one.
— kim (@kimmiechem2) July 25, 2013
Amazing how such a classic song comes about only because of a movie that’s now pretty much a footnote. #CR67
— T. R. Wilcox (@TRWilcox) July 25, 2013
According to director Val Guest, Sellers became such a problem during filming that they fired him, wrote him out of remaining scenes. #CR67
— #Bond_age_ (@007hertzrumble) July 25, 2013
Mike Myers owes a lot of his career to this movie, and Sellers and Andress and the rotating bed and this picture-taking sequence…. #CR67
— T. R. Wilcox (@TRWilcox) July 25, 2013
a romantic scene with a classic song turns into sellers doing push-ups, this movie is fantastic #cr67
— Liam Fitzgerald (@LiamFitzgee) July 25, 2013
Wait, is that a Hasselblad? Want. #CR67
— kim (@kimmiechem2) July 25, 2013
“A 1/500 at f2”. She must either be shooting at a crazy high ISO, or those lights are much brighter than they appear. #CR67
— kim (@kimmiechem2) July 25, 2013
We weren’t ready to have Bond novel exploded into 60s broad comedy. Mostly we resented them for not selling rights.RT @007hertzrumble: #CR67
— RichGuyPoorGuy (@SteveTowsley) July 25, 2013
So the joke here is that Fordyce is vaguely, uh, flamboyant? #CR67
— #Bond_age_ (@007hertzrumble) July 25, 2013
@TRWilcox @Krissy_Myers would have at you for that. #CR67
— #Bond_age_ (@007hertzrumble) July 25, 2013
Joanna Pettet (Mata Bond) went on to appear in afterschool specials and Murder, She Wrote. #CR67
— #Bond_age_ (@007hertzrumble) July 25, 2013
@LiamFitzgee Somehow that wouldn’t be out of place at all. #CR67
— #Bond_age_ (@007hertzrumble) July 25, 2013
The movie falls off the rails here. #CR67
— #Bond_age_ (@007hertzrumble) July 25, 2013
@007hertzrumble yeah but at least it finds its footing in the final casino scene #cr67
— Liam Fitzgerald (@LiamFitzgee) July 25, 2013
@007hertzrumble haha i can only imagine how confused people were when they went to see this for the first time #cr67
— Liam Fitzgerald (@LiamFitzgee) July 25, 2013
You might recognize the taxi driver (Bernard Cribbins) as Mr. Hutchinson on the Hotel Inspectors episode of FAWLTY TOWERS. #CR67
— #Bond_age_ (@007hertzrumble) July 25, 2013
You might recognize the taxi driver (Bernard Cribbins) as Mr. Hutchinson on the Hotel Inspectors episode of FAWLTY TOWERS. #CR67
— #Bond_age_ (@007hertzrumble) July 25, 2013
@007hertzrumble I saw that once…
— Skinslip (@skinslip) July 25, 2013
@skinslip …once….
— #Bond_age_ (@007hertzrumble) July 25, 2013
Evelyn’s gorgeous black leather gloves. Want #CR67
— kim (@kimmiechem2) July 25, 2013
This film has got some high style: a Hasselblad, clunky black glasses, Veuve Clicquot, red phones, tea sets. #CR67
— kim (@kimmiechem2) July 25, 2013
Helloooo Jacky Bisset. #CR67
— #Bond_age_ (@007hertzrumble) July 25, 2013
Jacky Bisset who bears a striking resemblance to Elizabeth Hurley/Vanessa Kensington. #CR67
— #Bond_age_ (@007hertzrumble) July 25, 2013
“My goodness, this is some strong shampoo” — Evelyn. #CR67
— kim (@kimmiechem2) July 25, 2013
Orson Welles reportedly insisted on doing magic tricks in his scenes, a suggested source of friction between he and Peter Sellers. #CR67
— #Bond_age_ (@007hertzrumble) July 25, 2013
Orson has arrived, and he’s doing magic. #CR67
— T. R. Wilcox (@TRWilcox) July 25, 2013
“…she sleeps above her covers… *four feet* above her covers. She barks, she drools, she claws!” #CR67
— #Bond_age_ (@007hertzrumble) July 25, 2013
Peter Sellers/Orson Welles hated each other so much they had to film their scene at the gambling table on different days w/ stand-ins. #CR67
— #Bond_age_ (@007hertzrumble) July 25, 2013
A carpet beater can be seen hanging from side of Welles’ chair. Link to CR novel when Le Chiffre tortures Bond, thrashing testicles. #CR67
— #Bond_age_ (@007hertzrumble) July 25, 2013
@LiamFitzgee Well, Orson Welles also lent his voice to the Transformers animated movie. #CR67
— #Bond_age_ (@007hertzrumble) July 25, 2013
@007hertzrumble i think that could be an interesting step for streep
— Liam Fitzgerald (@LiamFitzgee) July 25, 2013
‘100,000 pounds Sterling’ sounds so much better than the same amount in dollars. And for more reasons than economics. #CR67 #anglophilia
— kim (@kimmiechem2) July 25, 2013
This is even funnier when you know that Welles and Sellers were never in the same room for this scene. #CR67
— #Bond_age_ (@007hertzrumble) July 25, 2013
@TRWilcox “whacked out” is only way to put it. #CR67
— #Bond_age_ (@007hertzrumble) July 25, 2013
Ursula in Scots garb with a bagpipe machine gun. Not just any movie can lay claim to that. #CR67
— T. R. Wilcox (@TRWilcox) July 25, 2013
@007hertzrumble im gonna require that fee for watching this #cr67
— Liam Fitzgerald (@LiamFitzgee) July 25, 2013
And I think I speak for, well, everyone when I say, WTF just happened. #CR67
— #Bond_age_ (@007hertzrumble) July 25, 2013
@kimmiechem2 We could describe what is happening but you wouldn’t believe us. Even if you’d seen it before. #CR67
— #Bond_age_ (@007hertzrumble) July 25, 2013
And even though it’s already weird, the Frankenstein monster has yet to show up. #CR67
— #Bond_age_ (@007hertzrumble) July 25, 2013
@007hertzrumble hottest Moneypenny ever. IMO. #CR67
— Trevor Jost (@tpjost) July 25, 2013
You know Woody Allen just signed on for this movie so he could hang around with these women all day. #CR67
— T. R. Wilcox (@TRWilcox) July 25, 2013
Under boob. #CR67
— #Bond_age_ (@007hertzrumble) July 25, 2013
“I’ll unlock you and we’ll run amuck. If you’re too tired, we’ll walk amuck.” #CR67
— James David Patrick (@30hertzrumble) July 25, 2013
I got yammer-hammered during #CR67. Facepalm.
— James David Patrick (@30hertzrumble) July 25, 2013
Pretty sure that’s one of the sensory-reality rides at Disney World. #CR67
— James David Patrick (@30hertzrumble) July 25, 2013
The lights are going to go off in a second and a monster is going to get loose among the crowd. #CR67
— James David Patrick (@30hertzrumble) July 25, 2013
Film debut of DAVID PROWSE (Frankenstein monster)…. the less geeky among us might need to know that Prowse played Darth Vader in OT. #CR67
— James David Patrick (@30hertzrumble) July 25, 2013
And film legend George Raft is… just standing there. #CR67
— T. R. Wilcox (@TRWilcox) July 25, 2013
@30hertzrumble At least there’s no VAN NUTTER #CR67
— T. R. Wilcox (@TRWilcox) July 25, 2013
naturally there’s laughing gas #cr67
— Liam Fitzgerald (@LiamFitzgee) July 25, 2013
Why is there a monkey catching bubbles, again? #CR67
— James David Patrick (@30hertzrumble) July 25, 2013
JEAN PAUL BELMONDO, ladies and gentleman. #CR67
— James David Patrick (@30hertzrumble) July 25, 2013
@TRWilcox Seriously, there’s just no way to tweet that. #CR67
— James David Patrick (@30hertzrumble) July 25, 2013
The film’s many directors (other than John Huston) all went on to diminished careers post-#CR67.
— James David Patrick (@30hertzrumble) July 25, 2013
Val Guest took the worst hit. He was unfairly blamed for the mess because he took over primary duties late in production to salvage #CR67.
— James David Patrick (@30hertzrumble) July 25, 2013
Other famous filmmakers had their hand in the pot than those are credited. Billy Wilder contributed the “Nobody’s Perfect” tag line. #CR67
— James David Patrick (@30hertzrumble) July 25, 2013
DENIS! salutes the IMPOSTORS. But only a little. #CR67 #Bond_age_ pic.twitter.com/Mrnix7lnsv
— James David Patrick (@30hertzrumble) July 25, 2013
@LiamFitzgee WUT? He played Q’s assistant? Holy shit! John Wells… there he is! #CR67
— James David Patrick (@30hertzrumble) July 25, 2013
Dear God, the BD just automatically starts over. No menu. Nothing. Just starts. Again. What if I’m powerless to stop it? #CR67
— James David Patrick (@30hertzrumble) July 25, 2013
DENIS! salutes #CR67 and IMPOSTORS everywhere because he was goddamn in the movie! pic.twitter.com/VhmLbpCPAz
— James David Patrick (@30hertzrumble) July 25, 2013
@TRWilcox is it really that far off from moonraker or diamonds are forever?? #cr67
— Liam Fitzgerald (@LiamFitzgee) July 25, 2013
Even though I would probably never recommend it to anyone, except ’60s culture fans. #CR67
— T. R. Wilcox (@TRWilcox) July 25, 2013
@p2wy It’s balls out bananas by the end. When the Frankenstein monster walks in, all rules are thrown out the window. #CR67
— #Bond_age_ (@007hertzrumble) July 25, 2013
I still have the #CR67 theme percolating in my head. It’s really all @007hertzrumble‘s fault. 😉
— kim (@kimmiechem2) July 26, 2013