Episode 17: #Bond_age_Radio II – The Ladies Who Should Have Done Bond
In this sequel to the original #Bond_age_Radio episode, James (@007hertzrumble) spins tracks because music heals and we all need to heal sometimes. This episode of #Bond_age_ Radio highlights female recording artists that could have/should have/would have done a great James Bond theme, but never had the opportunity. I take listener requests, ignore them when they aren’t to my liking and ponder hypotheticals like “one-off-Bond” actor/director scenarios. James Bond music is not just about Shirley Bassey and it never has been.
Correction: Songstress was Anita Baker’s second album. I erred during the talky bits when I said it was her debut.
James David Patrick (@007hertzrumble), Johnny Fever, proprietor of this here #Bond_age_ project, co-President of CinemaShame, music lover, vinyl spinner.
Music Contained in this Podcast: (links go to Amazon page for each album)
James (@007hertzrumble) and Keith (@theactualkeith) go toe to toe in a Best Bond Quotes Draft. 5 blurbs vs. 5 blurbs for global supremacy. Along the way, they hit all the essential topics. Potential podcast spinoffs like the “Green Smoothie_Pod” and the “Blender_Pod”. What each Bond has every morning for breakfast. We also play a variation on the Six Degrees of Kevin Bacon game that proves our mental acuity and stable of useless information. This leads us to discussing why we weep for our futures. And Top Gun. Because Top Gun is timeless.
James David Patrick (@007hertzrumble), proprietor of this here #Bond_age_ project, Top Gun and Green Smoothie enthusiast.
Keith Bodayla (@theactualkeith), Podcast impresario and President of the Diamonds Are Forever fanclub.
Music contained within:
“The James Bond Theme” – Monty Norman and John Barry
“I Told You I Was Freaky” – The Flight of the Conchords
“Footloose” – Kenny Loggins
“It’s Martini Time” – The Reverend Horton Heat
“Dramatic Impact #1-#4” – Ren & Stimpy Production Music
“You’ve Lost that Lovin’ Feeling” – Tom Cruise and Anthony Edwards and co.
Host segments originally recorded on May 14th, 2016.
Copyrights are owned by the artists and their labels. No f’ing money is made from this podcast.
James (@007hertzrumble), Krissy (@Krissy_Myers), Greg (@MisterGreggles) and Keith (@theactualkeith) try to put SPECTRE in some sort of historical context and take a final stand on all things SPECTRE. Souls are assuaged, bowels are purged, and Krissy sings the standards to make it all stop… FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THAT IS HOLY STOP! They also, as a warm up exercise, recast DIAMONDS ARE FOREVER with current, working actors. Teaser: John Waters directs and #Bond_age_ casts the first American-born James Bond.
James David Patrick (@007hertzrumble), proprietor of this here #Bond_age_ project, angry pitchfork-wielding villager.
Krissy Myers (krissy_myers), mistress of the night/crooner, #HoorayForSexism consultant.
Keith Bodayla (@theactualkeith), President of Accents R Us, Freudian fixation on Diamonds Are Forever.
Greg Sahadachny (@MisterGreggles), podcast professional by day, Richard Greico by night.
Music contained within:
“The James Bond Theme” – Monty Norman and John Barry
“What’s Your Name (Belgian Remix)” – Zinno
“It’s Martini Time” – The Reverend Horton Heat
“What the World Needs Now” – Burt Bacharach
“Higher and Higher” – Howard Huntsberry
Host segments originally recorded on March 14th, 2016.
Copyrights are owned by the artists and their labels. No f’ing money is made from this podcast.
James (@007hertzrumble), while practicing his stone-cold sober radio voice, hosts a gaggle of #Bond_age_ misanthropes who’ve submitted their own Bond-related gripes. In the spirit of Festivus, we’ll all air our grievances and then strip down for some feats of strength and see who can pin the host. Along the way we’ll hope for some miracles and moments of clarity. Thanks to all of our contributors and even those who had technical difficulties while recording and couldn’t save their audio files (you know who you are). A modicum of thanks to anyone that thought about participating but couldn’t quite find the time. A modicum of thanks is kind of like a participation trophy but even lesser.
Enjoy this brief, whirlwind episode before we get back to the heavy lifting with episode 15. If you have suggestions about topics you’d like discussed on the #Bond_age_Pod hit me up on Twitter with your suggestions. We’re taking any and all requests! Just please don’t request any more comments on Diamonds Are Forever.
James David Patrick (@007hertzrumble), proprietor of this here #Bond_age_ project, angry pitchfork-wielding villager.
Guests:
The #Bond_age_Pod Festivus Special features guest spots from Eric Jones (@deacon05oc), Carey Kennedy (@crkennedyink), Greg Sacademy (@mistergreggles), and Greg McCambley (@gregmccambley).
Music contained within:
“The Seinfeld Theme” (Bass guitar cover) – Anna Sentina
“The Bomb” – The Sleepwalk Guitars of Dan & Dale
“Leila Dances” – John Barry
“You Only Live Twice” – David Arnold and Bjork
“Electric Boogie (The Electric Slide)” – Marcia Griffiths
“The Man from U.N.C.L.E. Theme” – Gerry Goldsmith
Host segments originally recorded on January 14th, 2015. I can’t vouch for the rest of these lunatics.
Copyrights are owned by the artists and their labels. No f’ing money is made from this podcast.
Hello, #Bond_age_Pod listeners. We’ve been spewing forth our Bond prattle for two years now and quite frankly I don’t know why you haven’t put us on mute… especially after my tirade on the SPECTRE episode. I know we said we were going to revisit SPECTRE with clearer heads but first I want to do something new with the #Bond_age_Pod.
We want to hear you. And not just your Twatter bag tweets. In this wondrous age of digital advancement, you can all appear on the next #Bond_age_Pod.
For this very special episode I’m going to combine two of my favorite things, Seinfeld and James Bond, into one blissful aural cacophony. The #Bond_age_Pod Festivus Special will give you all the opportunity to publicly air your grievances — about James Bond, about the #Bond_age_Pod. Hell, in the spirit of Festivus, we’ll take all your tired, crotchety grievances. We’re goddamn giving.
Here’s how it works:
Record your Festivus grievance in an audio file. You can use a voice recorder on your smartphone or Garage Band on your Mac or I don’t know what you people do with your PC’s anymore.
Introduce yourself: Name, twitter handle, however you want to be identified.
State your grievance: Keep it clean-ish. Pick something from the Bond universe that’s always bothered you, hammered at the back of your skull, like pride f’ing with you.
Skip the feats of strength: We don’t want to know.
Declare something a Festivus Miracle! Pick out something small or otherwise insignificant from Bond. A tossaway line, a casual moment that might not otherwise be noticed. Praise it! Then declare it a Festivus Miracle!
Once you put that recording in the can, send me the audio file at 007hertzrumble@gmail.com.
Sound good? You have until the end of the day on Christmas to send me your audio file for inclusion in the episode. I’ll edit the episode and post it sometime before the new year. Let’s rally the #Bond_age_ troops and make this a Festivus worthy of 53 years of James Bond. If you have any questions, feel free to shoot me an email. If you’d like to have a short Skype conversation with one of our hosts instead, we can arrange that in lieu of a solo recording.
James (@007hertzrumble), Krissy (@Krissy_Myers), Greg (@MisterGreggles) and Keith (@TheActualKeith) have a completely civilized conversation about the 24th James Bond film, Spectre. And by civil I mean at least half of the talking people left the room at some point during the conversation, Jay gets yelly and calls Keith a “beacon of positivity,” Greg tries to play peacemaker while simultaneously disagreeing with everyone and Krissy goes audibly apoplectic. In other news, Keith discusses the origins of his father’s hairstyle, someone brings up Diamonds Are Forever again, and a listener compares Spectre to vanilla ice cream with chunks of arachnid. Just another day on the microphones at #Bond_age_ HQ.
Greg Sacademy (@MisterGreggles), magnanimous and prolific host of the Debatable Podcast, #Bond_age_ chaperone.
Keith Bodayla (@TheActualKeith), beacon of positivity.
Music contained within:
“The Photoshop Song” – Rhett & Link
“Writing’s On the Wall” – Rory McVicar (Sam Smith cover)
“It’s Martini Time” – The Reverend Horton Heat
“Hank Scorpio Theme” – The Simpsons
Relevant images/videos:
Originally recorded on November 28th, 2015.
Copyrights are owned by the artists and their labels. No f’ing money is made from this podcast.
