Diamonds Are Forever Belated 45th Anniversary – 9pm ET – #Bond_age_
Honestly, I don’t need to say any more than this, do I? We missed the 45h Anniversary of DIAMONDS ARE FORVER during the tail end of 2016 when everyone was busy being depressed because 2016 f’ing sucked for a lot of people. That just means we have to hit 2017 where it hurts. We’ve got to take the fight to 2017. And the best way I can think of to do this is to live tweet DIAMONDS ARE FOREVER WITHOUT MERCY.
Join #Bond_age_ Wednesday at 9pm ET to “celebrate” the 45th Anniversary of DIAMONDS ARE FOREVER. Follow #Bond_age_ hashtag, bring all the snark you’ve got… because Blofeld did actually do this thing.
On Wednesday, December 7th, the #Bond_age_ ranks assembled to celebrate 4 years of #Bond_age_ live tweeting and the first SPECTRE live tweet. Though our opinions remain divided down the middle about this film, we proved, without a shred of doubt, that the only way to watch SPECTRE is with good company and plenty of twatter.
INITIATE THE SPECTRE LIVE TWEET DIGEST
#Bond_age_ turns 4! It’s the #Bond_age_versary!
To celebrate the special occasion we’re finally live tweeting Spectre!
I know that probably seems counterintuitive considering my opinions about the film. After all, they’ve been well documented here and here and here and here. One official #Bond_age_ essay, a review, and two podcasts. That’s a whole lot of anti-Spectre material I’ve put out into the world. And that’s not even counting my anti-Sam Smith maniacal ravings. In a way, Spectre‘s been a gift to #Bond_age_. That “way” is backwards and convoluted and only makes sense in the world of online riffing, but it’s true. We’d become complacent here at #Bond_age_.
The Craig era has offered us — and opinions will differ, of course — one truly great and two solid entries into the 24-film canon. Even if you’re in an anti-Craig, Quantum, or Skyfall camp, you have to admit that there’s very little truly great fodder in that film for mockery or bemusement. There’s certainly no “These bubbles tickle my Tchaikovsky!” moments. This brings us to Spectre, a veritable cornucopia of missteps and narrative stupidity. Some may have been entertained, but entertained or not, I charge you with pointing out the film’s flaws and admitting to the world that shooting down a helicopter with a pee-shooter pistol from a speedboat is dumb. It’s just dumb!
I love to hate Spectre. And now we all get the chance to spew our affection and/or #facepalm and/or hatred onto the Interwebs with reckless abandon. I return to the notion that Spectre is a gift, not a curse. Though, perhaps it is both.
The last couple months at #Bond_age_ have brought our little live tweet organization some hardships. The #Bond_age_ family has had its share of loss and disappointment in 2016. As a result of some of these life interruptions and challenges, we’ve dropped from three hosts to one. The hosting duties have fallen squarely on me… and there have been some unfortunate gaps in programming as I’ve tried to keep up.
So that brings me to the heart-to-heart portion of this post. After #Bond_age_versary 4, I’ve considered hanging up the #Bond_age_ tuxedo. I pour so much of my time into this particular endeavor that many other things have suffered. In 2012, I fancied #Bond_age_ a brief 23-week respite from my then labored fiction-writing process. I’d worked on a novel for a year and I felt angry and frustrated.
The #Bond_age_ exercise turned into a 100,000 word manuscript and 200+ weeks later, here we are. We’ve live tweeted all Bond films at least three times (except Spectre, of course). 40+ Bond imposters. Selections from many of our favorite TV shows including The Man from U.N.C.L.E., Remington Steele and The Avengers. The entire series of The Prisoner. Plus some odds and ends. I don’t know if this counts as an “accomplishment” per say, but it feels like something.
#Bond_age_ has forged many new friendships — many of which extend beyond the realm of the online sphere. I’m grateful for each and every person that’s contributed to #Bond_age_ through live tweets and My Favorite #Bond_age_ writeups and even offhand conversations on Twitter. #Bond_age_ is #Bond_age_ because of you. I just keep the lights on.
Quite honestly, I don’t know what 2017 will bring for #Bond_age_. This year has been so disheartening on so many levels, personally and professionally. Over the next few weeks I’ll figure out the place James Bond and #Bond_age_ will have in our lives in 2017, but for right now I want to focus on this celebratory, commemorative, happy-time occasion. #Bond_age_ turns 4. That’s reason to celebrate and enjoy the moment…
…with the live tweet of Spectre, for all the goddamn marbles.
We live tweet SPECTRE, on Wednesday December 7th @ 9pm ET. Follow #Bond_age_ hashtag.
As I corrected a few formatting issues in the #Bond_age_ jump page, I noticed that The World is Not Enough lacked an Opening Titles Remix. That had to be fixed, and it just so happened I’ve had a recent song from the duo Beyond the Wizards Sleeve (Erol Alkin and Richard Norris) bouncing around in my brain as a song begging for a Bond movie. I played “Black Crow” with the titles from The World is Not Enough and knew right away I had a match. It’s not that I don’t like the Garbage song… I actually love the Garbage song, but every so often you need to rearrange the furniture and “Black Crow” boasted the perfect tempo.
Unfortunately for the Beyond the Wizards Sleeve, the song will lack that immediate boost of nostalgia that allows for widespread reception or viewing. I get that. It’s easy to get into Die Another Day Remixed with the Talking Heads. Here’s the thing — by limiting Bond title songs to established artists who’ve sold one beeeeeeeelion records (or even my Opening Title Remixes! For shame!), you’re automatically eliminating 99.9% of artists. I understand the nature of the game — selling records for cash money. But artistic integrity matters too. And if the integrity of the thing mattered more, we wouldn’t have had to suffer through Sam Smith.
By the way, you should definitely give Beyond the Wizard Sleeve’s full record, Soft Bounce, a listen. It’s a brilliant combination of 1960’s psychedelia and what the kids are calling “acid house” these days. Even though I can no longer keep up with sub-sub-genres of electronic music, I still give it a high recommendation.